The password should be in the same message you got. If it is not there you can click on reset password and a new password will be sent to you cellphone number. If you still have problems you can contact Telus client care and they will reset it for yo...
http://www.nokia.com/global/support/software-update/wp8-software-update/availability-in-north-america/ Have you checked if the Update notification is on in your phone. You can also check for the update in your windowsphone.com account
If you don't have an add-on, yes, incoming and outgoing texts to the US will be for $0.40. You can also use apps sucha as BBM, or iMessage, or whatsapp